This might be a bit of a stretch, but if you ever have to ask if I love you, then I most likely do not.
Or I’ve failed in my love for you.
Either way, I’m not happy you asked.
I still fondly remember the first time you said you love me. It was like time stood still.
I could hear a butterfly land on a flower’s petal a thousand miles away. The blue color of the sky looked freshly painted, to a point of exaggeration. If a pin dropped at the other end of the earth at that point, I would have heard it.
Those who profess to be infallible are the ones you should fear the most. In a bid to prove how right they are, they will go to any length. They don’t care whose ox is gored.
You are not one of such. Welcome criticism and correction alike.
You have been taught by your environment to believe that you are static. You were made to believe that you are impervious to change.
Rather than accept criticism and correction, you put up a defense. You always have a reason and an excuse.
Maybe we should have enjoyed being friends and never bothered dating. Maybe we would still be friends rather than exes. Or maybe it was inevitable that we would get together.
There are a thousand and one other maybes, maybe in an alternate universe, we followed one of the several maybes, and ended up with a “happily ever after”.
Everything is real life. Online or in person, it is all real life. The consequences for your immaturity and foolishness are also not limited to online.
Jesus will forgive you for fornication or adultery, but if you got an STD while at it, you’ll have to bear the pain and treat it. He would forgive you for stealing, but you will spend a couple of years in jail if caught.
Grace does not exist in the lawbook, and even if your victim forgives you, the state might not.
There is a point you get to, and it is imperative you ask yourself, why am I here?
I’m not talking about life. I’m not being philosophical and I’m not talking about the age-old question of why humans exist, or why you, in particular, were created.
But if he ever says he is done being your man, if he ever says he wants a life without you, if he ever says it is time to part ways, I don’t want you to shed a tear. I don’t want you to be heartbroken. I don’t want you to doubt yourself for a second.
Please, know that someone sees you. Someone wants you. Someone would be glad to have you in their life.
That someone is me.
And when the time comes to take a stand, even if all alone, take your stand.
Stand for yourself and by yourself.
When things eventually get weighed and judged, let it be said that you never swayed. That you stood for what you believed in. And that you stood, even when alone.
If ever in life, one fellow predicate his love, respect, and acceptance for you on the premise of your ability to cook, you have my blessings to tell him that you can’t cook.
In truth, I am not against the bad guys. I also hold no grudge against those that love them. My beef is against those that have issues with the nice guy.
If the “bad guy” can proudly proclaim that he is a bad guy, why can’t the nice guy do the same?
From a dream come true to a nightmare come to life. That is how far my trying has brought me.
I hope you are happy. I hope you find different, or different finds you.
After it all, the heart wants what the heart wants. And my heart wants you.
Life without you is difficult. Unbearable. And I don’t want to get over you. I am struggling get used to be alone. Honestly, I don’t want to get used to life without you.
If I get used to it, there might be no coming back.
One of the major issues with people and their baggages is that we often notice people’s baggage before we notice the people themselves. This influences how we presume and prejudge them.
Stop choosing useless issues as the hill to die on. When people realize that you are that fellow that is always different just for being different sake, whatever respect and esteem they might hold you at would be eroded.
With all I hold dear, I love you. For all I hold dear, I’m sorry, I just can’t save you. Why do you make this so hard? Why have you made it impossible to save you?
As much as God is a merciful father, he is also a just Judge. You can’t keep making others cry out to Him in pains, and expect to just waltz through His judgment room at the end of time.
A famous man once said, “may our loyalty not be tested.”
I can’t help but say this, may our grace, our forgiving spirit, and our ability to forget, never be tested.
What if I didn’t mask my feeling?
What if you were not told that women can’t do the asking?
What if I wasn’t too scared to damage a good thing?
Maybe in another lifetime, we can be more than almost.